Monday, February 21, 2005
Alright then.
It has recently come to my attention (thanks to people who actually read my blog) that it is seemingly depressing. Well, seeing as you go to my school, and you know me, I am never depressed at school. My blog is my place to vent. So, I'm sorry if you think I'm really depressed and you don't want to read my blog anymore because it makes you depressed. Everyone can lay off. I'm not hurting anyone by getting my feelings out on the computer instead of my friends. I used to take it out on people that called themselves my friends. Do you know why? Because I could tell that their were fake. When you've moved now 15 times in 14 years you see things and are able to see through the fakes. You always move from one place to the next, never seeing the same people twice, and it all becomes a blur. You start not caring about what people say, not paying attention, just gliding through life. Its like a whirlwind of people. But my whirlwind is winding down, we just bought a house and have to stay in it for at least a year because its the first house my mom has bought. Well seeing as I've gone to the same school for now 2 years and have to stay another year or so, it looks like I'm going to stay here for the duration of my highschool years. Then its off to college. Another move, because I won't stay here. I'm considering either somewhere else in canada, not in british columbia at all, or somewhere in the U.k.. So, now do you all understand? that I would be depressed at school but I don't feel like lashing out at you, because thats what I do when I am depressed, angry, or any of those types of emotions. That, in fact, I am letting feelings out on the keyboard and into the internet to keep you as friends...
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2 comments:
Haha. You suck! Bitch. We all hate you...
Now if only that was true, then I could actually spend some time alone, as in by myself, as in without other people. It never seems to work though. I should become evil and bent on ruling the world, then maybe people will leave me alone. maybe.
Who says you can't comment on your own blog?
I would if it would make you feel better. But I've been down the whole world domination path. They just seek you out all the more because they want something from you. It's not much different than regular life, just more press.
Finding time to yourself shouldn't be all that hard. I spent almost all of my free time with my friends, when I had them, and still managed an unhealthy amount of alone time. Of course a blog could be considered alone time, but it's like having a diary with authorized snooping... Not the point of having one, really.
But I can see where you're coming from. I didn't move around nearly as much, but it's interesting that you attribute your quickness in judging character to your moving around all of the time. I never really pondered it out like that. See what you did? You have me using that word...
And I know where you're coming from with the agression thing. I try to remain detached from feelings, at least to sepparate decision making from emotions. Emotions cause errant decisions sometimes, but can't be ruled out entirely. The whole thing's rather involved. Anyways: I find it common for me to be extremely angry (rage, for lack of a better word) when I am saddened to an extreme degree. But lately a little more depression than I'm used to has crept in...
Anyways. Don't physically abuse your friends. You'll feel badly if you should seriously injure one of them. Well, hopefully you will.
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